Get Me Some Gingko Biloba STAT!

i'm not usually a birthday party kind of person. i get really stressed out trying to plan bday parties, regardless if it's for a friend or for myself. the biggest stress to me is picking out a venue that fits everyone's tastes. the venue is the first step. and if you start out badly on the first step, you know it's only downhill from there.

i wasn't planning on having a bday party, but then Gecko asked me what i was doing because she would come to NYC for that weekend. concurrently when i learned of that information, i also got an invite to ChubbyBunny's birthday party. ChubbyBunny's bday is 2 weeks after mine but she decided to have it on the 23rd jointly with a friend. CB's bday invite, for the afternoon at Boat Basin Cafe, in conjunction with Gecko coming into town, spurred me to spontaneously decide to have a bday party.

before i could back out, i created a Facebook event and started researching venues. when making my FB event, i remembered another stressor of throwing a party: who to invite. FB makes inviting people super easy and convenient since almost everyone and their mothers are on FB now. however, 1st you have to deliberate whether you want to make the event public or private. public allows your guests to invite other people, which is great in case you forgot to invite someone, so i made it public. but since it's public, anyone you don't invite will be able to see it, should it come up in their news feed or if they happen to glance it while on an invited guest's profile, which can be super awkward (even if they never confront you about it). this was my 2nd deliberation. as i haphazardly checked off friends to invite, the biggest dilemma was those individuals who i'd met before, hung out with, but never really talk to if it wasn't for "Y" (the person who introduced us and whom I'm actually friends with). as i checked the box to invite "Y" i'd have to decide whether to invite that acquaintance whom I knew on FB but didn't really know. would they care if they weren't invited? would they want to come because "Y" was coming but didn't know if it would be ok because I hadn't invited them? i felt like my brain was going to explode.

once that was done, i returned to the difficult task of choosing a venue. when i thought back on my past bar/club experiences, i realized how limited my memory actually is. it was like as soon as i tried to actually access my Manhattan venue database, i completely drew a blank. instead, all i could remember were places that i clearly couldn't have a party e.g. Kenka.  then there were places that would be great venues if i and my friends were willing to throw down $300-$450 per bottle to reserve a table and deal with line hassles e.g. Cabana, Hiro, 230 Fifth, Gansevoort, etc. (plus i find Meatpacking slightly annoying to get to via subway). every venue i could think of had its drawbacks: the Park (can't reserve a table upstairs in the atrium), Circle (too Asian), PS450 (west side + midtown), Pianos (cover after 11 and super crowded), etc.

i also can't believe how many places i can't remember the name or location of. i would vaguely remember the "feel" of a place, or the people i was with, but most of the time i couldn't remember "why" I was there or "where" it was. there was 1 particular night when Gecko and i went out and attended W's bday party. Gecko remembered the venue for W's bday party and i couldn't except for some vague, hazy recollections. initially, neither of us could remember where we'd been earlier that night, although i'd remembered having a really good time. so i decided to dive into the archives of this blog and see if i'd written about it somewhere. of course, i didn't. go figure. but it was really funny to read about all the hijinxes we used to get into back in the day. there was 1 month where i kept arriving home at 8 a.m. from nights out! and i found an entry where Oppa got into a fight!

while i remembered most of the events coinciding with the entries, i have to admit that certain details/aspects of the story i'd completely forgotten had ever happened. clearly, it did happen since i wrote about it, but why can't i remember? i'm seriously concerned about this failing memory. i'm not sure if it's a sign of old age, brain damage, or impending stupidity...

Waterfalls

THE QUESTION: what is art?
SUBQUESTION: how do you feel about public art?
CONTEXT: in this current economy and the cutting of the budget particularly in the arts, is art necessary? and when it comes to public art, where there are many instances of ppl having negative reactions to art in public spaces, should there be a formula for appropriate public art?

this was the question posed in my Law, Politics, and Personality seminar with Leonard Garment. someone's currently making an argument that there's a difference between "art that provokes with a message" vs. "art that just provokes." i don't agree with this statement. just like "one man's trash is another man's treasure" there can never be a blanket statement that there's only art that "provokes" without a message. i mean, maybe that's just me, but with content as subjective and varied as art (in all forms and media), i think it's hard to make such overly broad statements.

speaking of complex pieces of art (yes, this is a bit of a segue)Coleslaw has grown 1 year older. HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLESLAW! and as with all birthdays, there's gotta be a party. i tend to look at birthdays as actually non-momentous occassions because it's really just another day and pales in comparison to what you've undergone for the year. however, a lot of birthdays have been back-to-back lately and it's made me think about mine coming up. this year's definitely felt like 1 rife with more internal battlings and circumstances and when i look at Coleslaw's last year, i think she's also come across a lot and had a lot of experiences. everything that happens to us changes us in some way, and the more momentous and eventful the year, the more you change, grow, and develop. yes, i know, this sounds like a Hallmark card, but there's definitely a degree of truth to it.

not that any of that was reflected in the actual celebration. Six had made an Earl Grey infused vodka, which, if done properly, tastes delicious with lemonade or sprite and also her infamous sangria. i'd had it before, but never liked to eat the fruit (i swear, i'm gonna die of scurvy), but i ate some this time and the amount of rum steeped into that fruit is reedonkulous! every time i ate a piece my face would scrunch up and pucker but in a good way(?). everyone came over to pre-game a bit with Six's home-made beverages, and a rousing game of Kings ensued.

word of warning: never play Kings with Six if you're playing with waterfalls. that girl does not know when to stop! and as luck would have it, she was commonly the start of the waterfall or else close to the front.

next word of warning: never play Kings with sangria heavily infused with rum. it's quite dangerous, particularly when in conjunction with the above warning. Six got wasted before we even left the apartment. how wasted was she? she managed to break the heel to the boots i lent her before she even left the apartment. that's quite impressive.

Coleslaw's party was at Brazen (of course) and she headed over first with Cubed while DRC and i finished our drinks. we couldn't have been more then 45 mins later than Coleslaw to the party, and when we showed up, Coleslaw seemed fine. by the time i got my beer and turned back to her, which was probably 15 mins, Coleslaw was sloshed. i mean completely. it was really surprising.
********i have to make a break in this entry to comment that someone in my class just used the word chutzpah*****************

the whole night i kept getting calls and texts from Oppa because he was attending the party of a guy he'd wanted to introduce me to. around 2 AM i raced over to the Park to go meet him, only to find out 2 crucial facts he had left out of the scenario: 1. Oppa was wasted; 2. the party was the birthday party of the guy he was introducing me to. so suffice it to say, the guy was pretty drunk. not the best 1st impression and not the best way to meet a guy. i love Oppa to death, but when he's drunk, he really will stop at nothing to get you to come out but then when you do, it's usually never really worth it.

i cut my losses and said "bye" after hanging with them for about an hour and half. what did perk up my night was what happened on my way out. outside of the Park i ran into Joebo. i've met him before, and we've hung out (sort of) but he's not usually that social or talkative (to me anyways). but perhaps he was a little drunk, but we ended having a pretty deep and philosophical conversation about the state of the economy and politics. altho Joebo's a Republican and conservative, luckily i don't get into a frenzy the way Egg does so the convo went pleasantly.

i did learn something interesting tho, that raised Joebo's status in my eyes. he had just recently dumped the girl he was seeing because she didn't know who Palin was. gotta give him props for that.

real friends

for a while, right before i got the plague, i was taking some time off from the lifestyle of "living in the city" and being in your 20s. i was just getting too broke, too tired, too stressed out (from school and drama) and just all around burnt out. so i hibernated for a while and took some time off from anything too festive, just doing work, relaxing and (if i could be bothered) going out around brooklyn.

this always happens to me every once in a while. life's so circular sometimes. after a long run of constant outings w/large groups of ppl, everything tends to get a little monotonous. drinking. tables. late night food (recently it's always been ktown). cabs home. and it's always the same ppl. and i can almost guarantee that 1 of the ppl calling me on friday or saturday night is someone i haven't talked to all week (or the last 2 wks) aside from a random IM or gchat during the week that essentially asks how the other's doing. aside from going out together to someone's birthday party (how is it ALWAYS someone's birthday on the weekends? and do i really know that many ppl? i don't think so) these aren't always ppl i have a quiet dinner or drink w/, go watch a movie w/, invite over just to chat, meet for coffee. don't get me wrong, sometimes they are. even when i go out more often than not there's at least 1 person there who's been through it w/me and done all those things i just listed. when i take these sabbaticals from socializing it tends to be b/c i'm starting to go out just to go out. and then i tend to be w/ppl who are really just looking to add more body counts to whatever event they're going to just to be that person who knows at least 30 ppl in the party.

excuse me, i just dry-heaved at the thought of those ppl.

but never fear, i did eventually de-funk and went to Spoon's birthday party at Naked Lunch. every time i go here it's mad crowded but the DJ is so cute. Spoon and i have really known each other since high school but we attended middle school together too (different cliques, you know how the suburbs are). regardless, we've stayed friends and she definitely fits into my keeper category. she can definitely be a handful sometimes (when she makes her mind up to go buck, all hell breaks lose and i've definitely had my indiscretions on outings w/her) but she's also there for the quiet stuff too, it also helps i haven't had to be too vigilant about watching her when we go out together cause she can take care of herself. Kiks (another keeper from college) and i met at the bar-as always i was running late and got lost. all named streets are my kryptonite when it comes to sense of direction-and stayed for a few drinks before i met the Twins at Park which i appreciate for the ease of getting in (being female and all) and the calmness of the downstairs juxtaposed w/the dance floor upstairs. Oni and Yuka met me there w/some boys they'd picked up and we all danced and lost each other multiple times over the night.

and of course we ended up in ktown eating. and the cycle starts again?

I Need to Work on my Lower Body

ok, let's see if i can do quick catch-up entries now that i'm trying to be more functional. Oppa, who i totally miss, had a going away-ish event at Branch a while ago prior to his trip to Korea (which is where he is now). but before i could meet up w/Oppa i had made plans w/FDR to meet up 1st.


i haven't seen FDR since the singles mixer, and in all actuality i haven't hung out w/him since ASW's wedding in Vegas. it was actually really good to see him again and he's just as entertaining and easy to get along w/as ever. i introduced him to Oni (i am such a good friend. how many boys has this girl met through me at this point? ahem) but w/Oni's ex hovering in the wings i think that's a pretty dead end and FDR's 1 of the few ppl who shuns Facebook so there's really no way for them to stay connected. Casper met us at Gaslight in Little West 12th, which was surprisingly packed (w/o making you wait in line, an anomaly for that area) but played some pretty good music which is always refreshing. we stayed for a little and then headed over to Park to meet up w/Egg who i had ran into on my way out of the apartment and had told me he would be there.


we got into Park easily (we were the perfect guy-girl ratio: 2 to 2) and even managed to locate Egg, only to find out he was ready to leave. in fairness it was around 1 or 2 am. the truly surreal part was who Egg was there w/: Chace Honeycup (or should it be cut? and yes, this is a pseudonym bestowed on somebody just last night) and AsianFetish, along w/some other BLS kids. call me a little prejudicial but Park is not where i imagine that group going (sans Egg).


we finally got to Branch to meet Oppa where Boys Club was there w/their ringleader who was completely wasted. they all ended up bouncing but Oppa being the good oppa that he is, stayed w/us until the end. Branch plays pretty good music and we all danced a lot, and since this was shortly after my Cali trip, i totally had to try Margaret's stripper dance move, but alas, i couldn't pull it off w/o something to hold onto. and my legs were totally sore the next day. props to Margaret for being able to do that move w/o holding on to anything. she must have thighs capable of breaking a thighmaster.

an interesting night...

on another random weekend past i had a birthday party to attend at Park for one of the Boys Club. originally Casper and i were going to meet Yuka at a friend's house party but things ended up falling through so we decided to have a small pre-game at my place instead. i invited Bubby to come as well, as a sort of breath of fresh air (Yuka, Casper, Chipmunk, Oni and i were spending too much "us" time together on the weekends). Chipmunk and Oni were on a date so the rest of us drank some beers at my apartment before going out to Park.

Wifey had her own guest over. a mysterious man i believe she knew from high school and didn't want to introduce to me or the others. they spent all their time in Wifey's room which is adjacent to the living room me and the others were hanging out in. all of a sudden, i heard a very distinct banging on the wall. it was consistent. it was suggestive. i quickly ushered all of us to my room instead of the living room but the suggestion was already planted. o well, go Wifey. you get some ass.

we finally got to Park where i individually ran into members of Boys Club which was nice since i haven't seen them in a while. Pinky and his friends also ended up meeting us there which was another breath of fresh air from the usual crew. as always, Park was ginormously crowded and we were a pretty large group (Yuka had her international friends, Pinky had his boys, and Boys Club was milled around). while i looked for birthday boy to wish him "happy birthday" i let the others run free which turned out pretty interesting. Oni found a random to makeout w/ and another random to almost-makeout-w/, Chipmunk and Casper were stuck between entertaining Oni and meeting random girl friends. Pinky was a good staple/grounder to hang w/living up to the usual expectations of a good time.

after Oni's 2nd random almost-makeout i rounded up the troops and we were getting ready to leave. i was sitting at a table w/Pinky and his friends when i notice someone waving to me. it turned out to be Tweedledee of the Bobsey Twins! she was wasted sitting on a boy's lap and making out. she came over and gave me drunken love which was a giant surprise that i took w/a grain of salt but since then things have been more pleasant in the apartment between me and her so maybe she did remember the incident.

as always, i found myself in ktown w/about 12 people drinking baek saeju and samgyeopsal (6 orders!) and haemul pajun. that was fun by itself but i was so proud of Pinky for taking care of me and my friends. i always feel so proud when these oppas show their caliber and impress my friends since nobody else has really shown me they have the same.

The Park

so a while ago i went to Opus 22 for Stitch's party. Stitch is all kinds of hooked up so we had a table in the back w/a bottle of Grey Goose. it was pretty fun, a little cramped, but definitely the best selection of music i've heard while out in a while (lots of hip hop & R&B).

afterwards, everyone wanted to head over to the Park. now, i know i'm asian, but i'd never been to the Park before. and based on everyone's reaction when i told them about it, i feel ashamed as an asian. the final straw was when i called Egg to invite him to go and told him it was an asian club and he said "yea, i know. i've been there before". i felt so twinkified at that moment.

we had to wait on line to get into Park b/c we had 4 guys and 1 girl (me). turns out the Park has a rule that no one can get in w/o a girl. luckily at that moment Ming ran into some ppl he knew who had about 7 girls and 3 guys, so the ratio worked out. the downstairs of the Park is nice, w/a nice patio area to sit. however, we went upstairs which is extremely crowded and sweaty. this place is definitely an asian mecca. unfortunately, i didn't have my phone on me so when Egg got there w/his friend (a guy) they were stuck outside for a while until some random girls took pity and got them in. overall, i got the Park out of my system and now i can call myself a true asian.