i'm not usually a birthday party kind of person. i get really stressed out trying to plan bday parties, regardless if it's for a friend or for myself. the biggest stress to me is picking out a venue that fits everyone's tastes. the venue is the first step. and if you start out badly on the first step, you know it's only downhill from there.
i wasn't planning on having a bday party, but then Gecko asked me what i was doing because she would come to NYC for that weekend. concurrently when i learned of that information, i also got an invite to ChubbyBunny's birthday party. ChubbyBunny's bday is 2 weeks after mine but she decided to have it on the 23rd jointly with a friend. CB's bday invite, for the afternoon at Boat Basin Cafe, in conjunction with Gecko coming into town, spurred me to spontaneously decide to have a bday party.
before i could back out, i created a Facebook event and started researching venues. when making my FB event, i remembered another stressor of throwing a party: who to invite. FB makes inviting people super easy and convenient since almost everyone and their mothers are on FB now. however, 1st you have to deliberate whether you want to make the event public or private. public allows your guests to invite other people, which is great in case you forgot to invite someone, so i made it public. but since it's public, anyone you don't invite will be able to see it, should it come up in their news feed or if they happen to glance it while on an invited guest's profile, which can be super awkward (even if they never confront you about it). this was my 2nd deliberation. as i haphazardly checked off friends to invite, the biggest dilemma was those individuals who i'd met before, hung out with, but never really talk to if it wasn't for "Y" (the person who introduced us and whom I'm actually friends with). as i checked the box to invite "Y" i'd have to decide whether to invite that acquaintance whom I knew on FB but didn't really know. would they care if they weren't invited? would they want to come because "Y" was coming but didn't know if it would be ok because I hadn't invited them? i felt like my brain was going to explode.
once that was done, i returned to the difficult task of choosing a venue. when i thought back on my past bar/club experiences, i realized how limited my memory actually is. it was like as soon as i tried to actually access my Manhattan venue database, i completely drew a blank. instead, all i could remember were places that i clearly couldn't have a party e.g. Kenka. then there were places that would be great venues if i and my friends were willing to throw down $300-$450 per bottle to reserve a table and deal with line hassles e.g. Cabana, Hiro, 230 Fifth, Gansevoort, etc. (plus i find Meatpacking slightly annoying to get to via subway). every venue i could think of had its drawbacks: the Park (can't reserve a table upstairs in the atrium), Circle (too Asian), PS450 (west side + midtown), Pianos (cover after 11 and super crowded), etc.
i also can't believe how many places i can't remember the name or location of. i would vaguely remember the "feel" of a place, or the people i was with, but most of the time i couldn't remember "why" I was there or "where" it was. there was 1 particular night when Gecko and i went out and attended W's bday party. Gecko remembered the venue for W's bday party and i couldn't except for some vague, hazy recollections. initially, neither of us could remember where we'd been earlier that night, although i'd remembered having a really good time. so i decided to dive into the archives of this blog and see if i'd written about it somewhere. of course, i didn't. go figure. but it was really funny to read about all the hijinxes we used to get into back in the day. there was 1 month where i kept arriving home at 8 a.m. from nights out! and i found an entry where Oppa got into a fight!
while i remembered most of the events coinciding with the entries, i have to admit that certain details/aspects of the story i'd completely forgotten had ever happened. clearly, it did happen since i wrote about it, but why can't i remember? i'm seriously concerned about this failing memory. i'm not sure if it's a sign of old age, brain damage, or impending stupidity...